Merlin's scars
by Nononsense98
Summary: Merlin, Arthur and the knights are just messing about when they see something thats been plaguing Merlin for a while, was this a tale they all really wanted to hear? T because they're may be torture and bad language... Merlin angst...
1. Chapter 1

Merlin let out a girly squeal, and the knights roared with laughter as Arthur chucked more sloppy mud at Merlin. You see, Merlin didn't mean to push Arthur over; he just slipped! "Merlin you utterly useless, clueless, waste of space" Arthur shouted whilst throwing the next mud pie. Merlin cleverly dogged it and hit Percival straight in the face. _Crap._ Everyone stood still waiting for his reaction- Percival simply laughed and gathered a huge mound of dirt and lobbed it straight for Arthur. The next thing he knew, Gwaine was running towards him mud in hand and dirt all over his face and torso. It appears Arthur had shoved Gwaine in front of him to take the hit. Percival couldn't help but giggle at the angry little man…

An hour later laughs still erupted from the men as they washed off in the river, they may not have caught anything whilst hunting, but the mud fight was a laugh; and since Arthur had become king, it had been very serious and tense for him. That's why Merlin had organised this whole thing anyway- he had found Arthur's first grey hair. Leon and Elyan had started comparing scars "This was from a wilderin when I was 18" Leon had boasted about the almost invisible crease down his back, "that's nothing" Arthur had cut in, and as he did so, he washed his torso of mud and showed off a rather nasty looking stab wound. Gwaine noticed Merlin's edginess as he started backing off towards the shore, glancing longingly at his shirt. "Merlin?" Gwaine inquired, all turned to stare at the warlock with worry. "I-I'm c-cold-d" Merlin stuttered, "But its boiling…" Quoted the rather irritated king, but he knew something was wrong- he could tell from that sad and frightened look in Merlin's normally glowing blue eyes. But Merlin carried on stepping towards the shore and his shirt. That's when Merlin slipped on the unusually soft rock beneath his feet. He wasn't gasping for air long when a huge arm pulled him out with ease: it was Percival. After that short episode, Merlin could swear the air tasted sweet. When he finally recovered he peered up to see five pairs of glowering eyes towering above him, "Merlin, MERLIN? Are you alright?" The king did not try to hide his worry. "Healthy as a horse" Merlin croaked, Arthur sighed. Gwaine dove towards Merlin's shirt as Percival helped him up. "What the?" Leon gasped, "What?" Arthur had shouted a little too loudly. Percival forced the young warlock to turn around so they could see his back and what all the fuss was about; Merlin's struggle was useless against Percival's hunk of muscle. That's when they saw it… The streaks of white line, which covered his back. "Bloody hell!" Gwaine cursed along with a chorus of gasps. The story of these whip marks was a painful one for Merlin, and he knew he was going to have to tell it.

Sat around the fire- despite pleas for him to sit down and rest- that Merlin had created. They sat in silence stirring their stew or lifting it then dropping it from a height, staring at the blazing orange, yellow and gold. Gwaine was never one for quiet time. "Merlin, when the hell were you whipped?" all heads snapping up in shock at Gwaine's sudden inquisition. "I-I… It doesn't matter" Merlin stumbled, "Of corse it does Merlin!" Elyan felt the tension sore. "Merlin, I want to know if someone hurt you." Arthur declared, Merlin softened at this- Proud at his friend, acknowledging he was once an arrogant dollop head. But the sadness remained and the hurt and memory made him wince in pain. Gwaine saw this and made his way around the fire to sit on the same log as Merlin, coming down with a small thump. _Damn_ Merlin knew he wasn't getting out of this one, one stubborn and pompous knight? Maybe. Five stubborn and pompous knights? No chance. _"I have you now boy. You're not getting out of this one. I promised you would suffer!" _Merlin shuddered in remembrance. All the knights tensed and Arthur tried to hold back the tears, whatever had happened to Merlin, it wasn't good. This inhumane beating was still hurting his serv- friend, years after it had happened. _Curse whatever vile man has done this to my friend _Arthur was fuming. "Merlin, please tell us… You're our friend and we can see this is hurting you. Your safety is in our hands yes, but we do care. You helped me feel excepted in my time of need, a friend at first sight, now please. Please, help us to understand so I can begin to return the favour..." Percival and the caring confession of this seemingly harmless giant, who was spilling his guts, shocked everyone. Arthur was in admiration.

At that precise moment war raged on inside the young warlock, although he couldn't stand the memory, he so wished to grant Percival an answer to his plea. But he was being torn up by pain and confusion, would it feel better if they knew? Would it earn him respect? Would they pity him? Would they think less? Of corse his friends should know, he trusted them with his life. No they shouldn't, this is a burden they need not bear, a thought they didn't have to own. For what seemed like hours the warlock was caught up in this conflict of to tell or not, fighting himself. No, he wasn't fighting himself, he was fighting the pain and grief he had locked away inside of him for so many years. Maybe it was time to let it out? To confront his fears of this memory that would sting until healed completely.

Arthur watched on as he saw the battle behind Merlin's eyes. No one pressured the warlock into making a snappy decision, picking old scabs always hurt. Percival smiled to inwardly, happy he told Merlin how he felt, hoping it would offer courage. Leon simply admired his rough looking but soft friend, and turned to Merlin seeing the same bloodshed Arthur was seeing; but Leon didn't understand the true extent of the pain behind those eyes, not like Arthur did. Elyan's mind had flashed back to the scars he had seen plaster Merlin's back, scar upon scar, he winced at the thought of the pain Merlin must have been through, the agony. Gwaine simply stared at his friend, waiting, hoping. Hoping that he would be able to help Merlin heal. Merlin was Gwaine's first friend, and for a long time, his only friend.

"I was never really accepted in Eldore…" Merlin started. Arthur gulped, how much pain was his oldest friends confession causing him? And was this a tale they all really wanted to hear?


	2. Chapter 2

So here it is, part 2. You can tell I have no life, but I really enjoyed writing this one. I have never had so many ideas in my head at one time. I really hope I didn't disappoint anyone after all those amazing reviews! Oh, theres a point, thank you! I was stunned by some of those compliments! Hope the paragraphs aren't too long this time...

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"Merlin!" Hunith called, and as she did, she ran into Merlin's room to see his eyes blazing gold. "Merlin? What do you think you're doing?" Hunith wasn't mad at him, no not mad, but she did like seeing him flutter in confusion trying to come up with some excuse. Because when he couldn't think of one, he would flash one of those goofy grins she adored so much. "I-I e-err… W-well" He struggled, and lost. A smile tore across his face, reaching his ears- much to Hunith's pleasure. She giggled at her gangly son with pride, and Merlin couldn't help but rejoice at his mother's childlike laugh. This mere, small moment was perfect.

Only to be interrupted by Gareth, one of the village elders. His wife was having a baby, and Hunith was the only midwife is Eldore. "HUNITH. It's her time! W-what do I-I do?" The normally brave, wise man was a nervous wreck. "You, calm down. Elaine will be fine, and soon you will have a beautiful baby. Merlin, don't get into trouble, please?" Hunith pleaded, anyone would have thought she was just joking with her son; But Merlin saw the dread in her eyes and nodded. "Me trouble? Never" Merlin teased, keeping the charade in place. And with that Hunith gathered some herbs and ran out the door.

Merlin cleaned for a while. But that easily bored him, so he abandoned the half scrubbed floor and traipsed outside. He went to call on Will, but his father had said he was busy. _Great. just great_. Now what would he do? He had no other friends. People liked Merlin, but no one really accepted him- he was weird. And these people were nothing if not suspicious, damming everything and everyone that they didn't understand. Sure, they were friendly, but only to a point.

He walked for a while when he came across a child reaching for an apple. *Stealing an apple. The old man selling the fruit caught him and started to shake the poor boy violently. The young warlock could see the little one was hungry, and decided to intervene- and NOT with magic.

Merlin simply tossed a coin towards the old man and grabbed the little boys hand, when at a safe distance he smiled. "T-thank you-u" the boy stammered, with a genuine smile on his face. "You're welcome! But don't steal next time… You can always find honey and berries on the outskirts of the forest at this time of year" Merlin beamed. The boy nodded fiercely- Merlin thought his head would come of his shoulders- and ran off.

On his way back home, Merlin glanced over at the fruit seller- he was already glaring at merlin. _Weird. _But everything else seemed normal enough, people stepping out of Merlin's way, _normal. _People selling and buying things, _normal. _People running around worrying if they have enough harvest for Kanen, _normal. _

The next day Merlin awoke with confusion, his mother was stood in front of him with one finger over her mouth, eyes wide. He didn't speak as he looked around trying to collect his thoughts. _Kanen. Shit. _Merlin jumped up, but he still didn't make a sound as he peered out of the tiny hole he called a window. It looked as though the raiders were just about to leave.

When an old man, the old fruit seller from yesterday, whispered something in Kanen's ear. Suddenly all the riders jumped down of their horses with a loud thud and started terrorizing the village, screaming for more. Merlin glanced in Kanen's direction, he saw him grabbing one of the villagers in a chokehold. It was Will,_ Will. _Merlin moved faster than he ever had before. Hunith cried her sons name, begged him not to interfere, but even she knew there was no stopping him. Compassionate fool, Her compassionate fool. And she was so proud of him.

As Merlin shouted back for his mother to stay inside, he ran as fast as his legs would carry him. Will was Merlin's first and only friend, and aside from his mother, no one else WANTED to talk to Merlin- or even go close. He would protect his friend with his life.

He grabbed a piece of firewood as he ran out. No one seemed to notice him running towards the two men. When he got close enough he pulled the firewood above his head and shoved all his strength into his throw. It worked, _crap it worked! _Kanen was now marching with anger towards Merlin! Merlin hadn't thought up the rest of the plan yet. Magic was a no- he couldn't in full view of all these people! _No, no, no NO! _

Merlin's senses were screaming in protest- DEFEND YOURSELF. Before he could comply with what was going on, Kanen was dragging him to the floor, punching his torso and chest with iron fists. Out of fear Merlin kicked out, and Kanen in shock from this sudden rebellion from the runt, stumbled backwards. Soon Will was behind Merlin dragging him away, whilst one of Kanen's men helped him up. "You will pay! I promise you will suffer!" Kanen spat, holding his head. He stomped off towards his horse, and was soon gone.

"Merlin, mate, what the hell were you thinking?" Will coughed, still recovering from the heavy arms that had clamped themselves around his neck. Merlin simply patted his back and forced himself up off the dirt, holding his stomach- he felt like someone was messing around with his intestines, trying to make mash potato out of them.

He didn't know how but his mother was soon by his side shoving him towards his house. "I don't think it's too bad dear… MERLIN, stay still, Merl-Merlin!" Hunith's voice obvious with irritation. Merlin was squirming, and Will just sat there wincing at his best friends pain, unable to do anything. "Merlin don't do that a-again" Will whispered, pain in his voice making it crack, and then he left. Just left, stalked out of the room with tears in his eyes. Merlin consider going after him, "leave him be" Hunith warned, she could read the boys mind.

That night there was an explosion of noise in the room: first, Merlin heard the door slam, then his mothers scream, and before he knew it- five bulky men came crashing in, took his arms and legs and dragged him out. Merlin was squealing with pain, as Hunith was held there helpless. The young warlocks struggles simply annoyed the men, then blackness. Merlin was drawn under, into the deep and dark abyss of nothingness- and no way back.

When he woke up, he had completely forgot about the situation at hand. Eyes fluttering with ignorance. _What the hell? Why am I chained? Why does my stomach feel like its on fire? Why does my head hurt? Where's my shirt? _And with one fleeting look up, his head reminded him of all the answers. Stood around him as Kanen, the 5 men that had captured him, and some more bandits. All with knife like glares pointing at him. Kanen was showing his teeth, dirty yellow and brown rectangles with chips and gaps- absolutely disgusting. _My god! Do you ever brush?_ Merlin considered saying it out loud, but he didn't think it would help him with whatever was to come. Nahh- what the hell? "My god! Do you ever brush?" Kanen would make sure Merlin would regret that one.

"I have you now boy. You're not getting out of this one. I promised you would suffer!" His words stung, and Merlin knew pain was coming. He had just aggravated Kanen futher. Merlin knew lots of pain was coming.

That's when he saw it, the slippery black snake that was entwined in Kanen's hand. Something any sane man dreaded when dragged to a torture chamber. The long flesh eating evil could make even the most loyal talk. And that's what Merlin feared the most, he had no bargaining tool, nothing to persuade Kanen to end his pain. Kanen didn't want to end his pain, Kanen wanted to hear Merlin scream and cry until he was unconscious. _For Will _was the only thing that gave him a hint of comfort.

The young warlock could not understand why any other human would want to harm another like this. All Merlin had done was help a friend out of a tight spot, and now he was condemned to this? The evil of some people could not be comprehended or explained and that what how Merlin was different, even with this foul man in front of him- who was beyond help- he tried to understand. Merlin's purity matched that of no other man on earth and even this terrible affliction could not change that. Little did Merlin know, the only thing that could ever change that was a betrayal from Arthur Pendragon- a name he had only heard tales of.

Kanen's harsh voice snapped him from his reprieve "Time to scream" and that's when the first crack of the whip bit at his bare back. A blood-curdling scream was wrenched from him as the blood trickled down his back. Skin ripped apart like paper, torn like the bottom of woman's corset when its been stood on. More screams erupted from a now gasping Merlin as the whip was pummeled towards his body with brute force, again and again and again. Soon there was no part of his back left in tact, and still Kanen brought down the whip upon his back. The wounds with dried up blood sealing them screamed in protest, as they were re-opened, again and again and again.

But Merlin did not resort to begging, no, he already gave Kanen the satisfactory of his screams- he would not give him this! And soon, whether he wanted to beg or not he could not speak, damn, he could hardly breathe. Blackness took him again, except- this time- he had welcomed it with open arms and eagerness.

Hunith had been searching for hours- and even though Merlin had never been accepted in Eldore- along with all those able bodied that lived in Ealdore. What they had found, dumped by the edge of the forest like garbage was something that to this day, still haunts Hunith's dreams…

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Da daaa! I was thinking about doing a third chapter with Arthur and the knights again, or should I leave it? Please review and any pointers for future stories and stuff would be much appreciated! as always! And again sorry if I disappointed anyone!


	3. Chapter 3

Here it is, the third chapter! I had such bad writers block with this, and thats why its so short. But I tried to get across the knights feelings...

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"I was never really accepted in Ealdore…" Merlin started. Arthur gulped, how much pain was his oldest friends confession causing him? And was this a tale they all really wanted to hear?

No, it wasn't a story they wanted to hear.

As Merlin ran through the story- leaving out the magic bits of course- the knights were completely still, engrossed by the horror coursing through their ears. They couldn't help but flinch every time Merlin had talked about Kanen. The distress and pain so obvious in his voice the knights could feel it, feel it like the memory was their own. The brave knights of Camelot were nothing compared to the heroic figure they all adored, they had seen men go through less and come out worse. Merlin's bravery would have been commended had he been a knight.

Merlin had so much taken from him in his years, and the knights figured they had not heard half of it.

Elyan was of course devastated for his friend, but couldn't help admire as the warlock told his story. Courageousness and strength till the end. Elyan would take this story with him everywhere, he would allow it to change him and control his actions. Make him a better knight, and a more worthy friend to Merlin.

Leon was confused as to how someone who looked so innocent could have gone through so much. He had seen Merlin age at least twenty years since being at Camelot- from all the stress. Before he had never understood, he knew now that Merlin still had a lot of secrets he was holding back on. But Leon would never fully be able to comprehend just how many secrets Merlin had.

Percival wanted to hug Merlin, his scrawny friend looked like a lost child- alone and afraid on a cold dark night. He cared for Merlin and since Lancelot's death they had got closer, bonding through their similar damage by the loss. And now he saw him cowering from his own thoughts, it stung. Percival had lost all his family, and considers the knights and Merlin his brothers, but Merlin more so. He couldn't help but shudder when his brave friend started whispering about the pain of the whip.

Gwaine could see his friend struggling, he patted the shaking figures shoulder in the hope it would comfort him, it just made him flinch away. This added to Gwaine's grief and a fresh dose of sadness over came him. He wished he could make Kanen pay for the anguish he had caused; Gwaine would hurt Kanen like he did Merlin if he had even the smallest chance. Merlin for a long time was the only person who would put up with his crap, his only friend. Now he had the knights- his brothers in arms- but Merlin still meant more to him.

Arthur was gob smacked. Yes he did sometimes call Merlin useless, but he never meant it, ever. Arthur always knew there was something else to Merlin. But he could never put his finger on it, and he still wasn't sure. He had allowed Merlin his moments of glory, but he suddenly came to see Merlin in a different light. Arthur saw a worthy man of more than just his friendship. Seeing his friend hurt made him mentally kick himself. From that moment Arthur promised himself he would treat Merlin better.

When Merlin finished they were all stuck in silence, "You cannot begin to understand how delighted I am that I was the one to stick a sword threw his gut" Arthur broke the silence with whispered anger. "You what?" Gwaine glared- he wanted to kill the bastard. "I went to Merlin's village to help his mother stop raiders from taking the crops. Had I known previously what he had done, I would have prolonged that pain" The darkness in Arthurs voice heightened as he smirked. "I remember that, I- had to cover for you" Leon scolded.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that Merlin" Percival murmured, and the warlock gave him a smile. "It's not your fault Percy" Merlin disagreed, he was the only one allowed to call Percival: Percy. "Its no one but K-kanens fault. And he paid. Now if you all don't mind, I don't want to talk about it anymore" Merlin grew angrier as he got to the end. Suddenly he stood up, grabbed the dishes and ran of to the river to clean.

Gwaine got up to go with him, but Arthur grabbed his arm and yanked him back. "He needs time" the king declared, Gwaine couldn't protest with that, but it doesn't mean he had to like it.

"He's trying to hide from it" Elyan stated. They knew it was true, Merlin was running from the truth, he had for years. "We need to help him, but I don't know how?" Arthur admitted miserably, looking down playing with his fingers while he spoke, the last part on purposely muffled. They looked at their king with awe- did king Arthur seriously just admit he didn't know how? Gwaine saw an opportunity "Pardon princess?" struggling to hold back a grin. "You heard. Idiot" frustration plastered Arthurs face. Gwaine was content with that; he would have pushed it had Merlin not been in such distress.

"Lets go find him, and Arthur you right, we need to help him. And we will" Gwaines voice took on a serious tone. And with that, they ran off towards the river in search of their friend.

They had no clue how, but one thing the knights knew, was they would help Merlin through this no matter the cost. They would go to the end of the earth for their friend, through the fire, to hell and back. Because at some point Merlin had been there for them in their time of need- either mentally or physically. And they owed him, they owed him so much, and yet, they still didn't know just quite how much they did…

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Soooooooo. Please tell me what you think- I think this is the last part to this story. But please, if you have anything you want me to write about, a storyline, more whump, strong merlin ect. pm me :) (NO SEX SCENES EVER)

And thank you for your reviews previous, keep 'em coming, pleaseeeeeeeee? ;D


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